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If you’ve been on Facebook for any length of time, you’ll know that it can be a mixture of amusement and cringe to see those Facebook Memories pop up. It can also be an interesting journey into our past selves – to see where we have changed and grown, and also to see things that are the ‘same as they ever were’.
The picture attached to this article came up today. I drew this 12 years ago, when I was experiencing a really rough time in my life. Looking back, I can recognise that I was most likely in the grip of depression, and this doodle was my way of expressing the experience I was having.
There were many things in my life at that time that made me feel as if I were assailed by invisible forces, and every little twist of life I then attributed to this feeling that the universe had it in for me.
Many of us have similar periods in our lives, when it seems as if life is determined to kick us about like a football. And depression can creep up on us, or even hit us like a huge wave crashing over us, seemingly out of nowhere. We don’t often realise it at the time, but it is likely that we are experiencing medical depression. If you are feeling this level of despair, do please seek help. There is help available via your GP, or you can use the resources at https://www.suffolkmind.org.uk, who can signpost you to help.
Thankfully, I came through this rough time, with the help of my wonderful wife, family, friends and my faith – knowing that, even though it did not feel much like it, God was with me through the darkness. It was only when I came out the other side and could look back that I saw that God was with me, giving me the tiny amounts of strength that I needed to do the things that would help me. To encourage me to exercise, to go for walks in the countryside and find healing in the peace and the wind and the beauty of nature; to give me enough energy for that evening with friends, or to make that phone call; to give me the nudge I needed to be in the right place at the right time to listen to others speaking about their experiences and to find I wasn’t alone.
These are all small things which, bit by bit, can help us move through those darker times into the light. They may not be the whole picture, we may need additional help, and we may not feel like doing any of them, but exercise (especially outdoors) and being with others can be some first steps of self care when we begin to feel a loss of hope or joy in our lives.
Reach out to others if the picture seems familiar to you right now. Reach out to others if you recognise any of these experiences or feelings – they may not be able to dispel them, but they may be able to signpost you to places where you can get help. But they might just pop round to see you, or go on a walk with you, and journey with you as, “when you are going through hell, keep going.”
Fr Ben
